Editor and Revisor

I am interested in being a book editor if directing doesn't work out so if you have a story you want to be reviewed, edited, or commented on come here. Also, I can do reviews of stories on here but WARNING: I am going to be completely honest and be legitimately reviewing Qfeast stories. So just ask if you want me to do something for you!

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Please review what I have so far for this story. More is to come btw:
http://www.qfeast.com/story/v2ffJe/Balenor-s-Sweetheart-Hayley-s-Story
Balenor's Sweetheart - Hayley's Story
Balenor's Sweetheart - Hayley's Story
In this story, meet a young mage by the name of Hayley Suntora, and her story of how she became the last hope in saving her kingdom from Mosino and the Void.
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on October 02, 2014
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https://www.qfeast.com/story/Hwra5i/Misty-s-return-1?rel=sl
Please review- this is my first story on here and I'm not sure about it
Misty's return (1)
Misty's return (1)
Why? That's all she wants to know, on that evening. Why her? Her life and the worlds entwined
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on October 02, 2014
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--D R E A M--
--D R E A M--
After the day lost easter came Artemis, a young girl lost everything.. Her family, her friends. Everything she ever cared about. Cancer was now a deadily thing in 2026. If you were infected.. It was over. Artemis had gotton into a deep coma.. But now shes in a new world
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on August 13, 2014
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Forty-Six
Forty-Six
In a corrupt land called Quiara, everything it's citizens do is closely monitored and freedom is all but absent. It will take the courage of a small (but growing) group of rebels called the 46 (the meaning of life) to save Quiara and bring it back to it's former glory.
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Lady_Artemis
Why did you unpublish this story?!
on October 02, 2014
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Elleyd
Definitely
on July 27, 2014
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JeweledOwl812
Well I think if I don't read it I will be less likely to copy it
on July 26, 2014
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Elleyd
Well, the adjustments were pretty much don't copy the plot of 1948 xD
on July 26, 2014
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JeweledOwl812
Um...what were the adjustments? And I'm going to read 1948 when I go to the library next week. I think I'm going next week anyways...
on July 26, 2014
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on July 20, 2014
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True Love Can Die
True Love Can Die
Attack of lung cancer. Living with it is bad enough, but getting teased about it lowers my self-esteem and brings on stronger pain. At least I have Ryan with me, he would never hurt me. Right?
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JeweledOwl812
@Coolcass22 Yay more chaps!
on July 10, 2014
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Coolcass22
Wrote more, your request of course hehe
on July 08, 2014
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Coolcass22
Ok, I'll write more haha and sure, I'll try to reduce the speed in the next few chapters. Ty x
on July 08, 2014
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Elleyd
In only two chapters, this story has already captured my undivided interest. With beautiful word choices and fascinating character development, the author has already gripped the readers heart.

Note: WRITE MORE. Also things are going a little fast so we don't have any real connection with the characters but that may all come in time.
on July 07, 2014
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Coolcass22
Tysm, it was late when I did it and maybe that had some effect on it? Anyway thank you, I will take note of that
on July 04, 2014
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on July 04, 2014
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Hey---- Recently I've been receiving a lot of membership requests and also helper requests. I am totally fine with that and even promote it as I am just one person and having many different opinions is in general a good thing. Please note though, I am still running this page and if your review is unsatisfactory I will take it down. I expect you to follow the rules as this is a "professional" page as we are handing out real advice and critiques. Don't take this as a threat as most See More▼
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on July 03, 2014
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Heartbreak Girl
Heartbreak Girl
Luke dedicates his life to Lauren, the one who never sees the truth. Okay, so this is technically a Luke Hemmings fan fiction, but you don't have to know who Luke Hemmings or 5 Seconds of Summer are to understand it, because I'm just going to write it as a normal story. I hope you like it!
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Elleyd
My pleasure
on July 03, 2014
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swageyamatobiyolo
@Elleyd - thank you so much!!
on July 03, 2014
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Elleyd
A classic high-shcool teen romance full of broken hearts, crushes, and friendzones... Good characters and nice plot. A good thing to read if you're craving something light.

Note: It's good but it sounds like all the other good teen romances out there.... You have the core of a great story but you have to make sure what you're building around the core is original See More▼
on July 03, 2014
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swageyamatobiyolo
Thank you so much!! Yeah, I was thinking that I'm getting to the point too soon, haha!!
on July 02, 2014
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CrystalDiamond2323
The plot of this story is well set, in modern day. It follows a simple FanFic storyline with twists, and teaser chapters. It's one of the
FanFics that has brought most attention on qfeast!!! It started picking up good speed about 1/3 of the way into the story.

If I could change anything, it would be that some parts are TOO fast, you don't want to miss important See More▼
on July 02, 2014
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on July 02, 2014
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OK, so, I had no idea this many people would be asking me to read all their stories so I'm going to have to limit the amount I'm reading. I cannot read 20 30-chapter-long stories and get to everyone in an appropriate amount of time. If the chapters are really short, like I know some are, that's a different story but on average it just takes too much time to read that much. I will read as much as I need to to come up with a good review and good critiques. If I have free time on See More▼
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Elleyd
on July 02, 2014
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Kisume
:3
on July 02, 2014
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Elleyd
Haha, yes, Dashy.
on July 02, 2014
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Kisume
and i can help!
on July 02, 2014
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on July 02, 2014
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I've only done one chapter of the story below so its not completed yet x
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Elleyd
I figured and by the time I read it you had done two
on July 02, 2014
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on July 01, 2014
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Falling For You
Falling For You
I shot up, realising I was in a metallic room. It was cold and I felt goosebump's appear on my arms, they were white as snow. It was a sickly white and as I tried to stand up, handcuffs were grabbing at my arms then I saw it, my arms were slit all over.
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Elleyd
on July 04, 2014
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Coolcass22
there haha. only person who can know
on July 04, 2014
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Elleyd
You can delete it so no one else can see
on July 03, 2014
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Coolcass22
Everything can read this now oops aha
on July 03, 2014
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Elleyd
hahahahaha
on July 03, 2014
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on July 01, 2014
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Day of the Dog
Day of the Dog
Cassidy has just lost her mom, and is really, really hurting. On November 7th, her Dad and her visit Cassidy's mom at the graveyard. Later, when she's walking around the forest behind he house, she hears the wounded cry of an animal that just might help heal her heart. Enjoy! Rate, Follow, and Comment your suggestions!
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Elleyd
:3
on July 02, 2014
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Kisume
not true, but thx anyway
on July 02, 2014
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Elleyd
@Rainbow_Dashy aw thanks but I'm not a pro either you're just as good as i
on July 02, 2014
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Kisume
Very touching and lovely story. I especially loved the details, the chest full of memories, how the tombstone was decorated, little thing that don't offer much to the plot but make the story more captivating. It has an interesting moral, portraying the pains of grief in a message that sometimes you just have to move on, "filling our hearts" with little things. See More▼
on July 02, 2014
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Kisume
Elleyod said i cld do a review too, yaaay!!! dont take it close to the heart, cause im not a pro like she is...
on July 02, 2014
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on July 01, 2014
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Hii, how do you enter ur story uhh?
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Elleyd
np :3
on July 01, 2014
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Coolcass22
Woo ty x
on July 01, 2014
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Elleyd
You go to your story and copy the link onto here. Qfeast and I will do the rest.
on June 30, 2014
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on June 30, 2014
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Chosen
Chosen
Every five years one child from each family 10-18 is chosen because of their abilities and Amethyst Brite is one of these. She must find out what element she controls and survive the Element Testing.
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JeweledOwl812
@Elleyd Thanks! @CrystalDiamond2323 np
on July 03, 2014
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CrystalDiamond2323
@JeweledOwl812 thanks!
on July 03, 2014
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Elleyd
@JeweledOwl812 Good job.
on July 03, 2014
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JeweledOwl812
@CrystalDiamond2323 A truly amazing original story, with adventure, action, and even a pinch of romance. The "element" idea is very widely used and popular, but you managed to give it a new and exciting twist, while still keeping the well-liked theme. Good job! Plus, it reminds me of Dauntless Initiate training (in a good way, of course )

Note: There are See More▼
on July 03, 2014
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Elleyd
no I've been doin other reviews sorry
on July 02, 2014
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on June 30, 2014
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Ok the story below(Under the moonlight) isn't finished so far and the chapters can be short as well as it's probably got a lot of mistakes but..could you please review it? I'm hoping to become a author ..So I'm trying to improve

http://www.qfeast.com/story/wYvuaW/Under-the-moonlight
Under the moonlight
Under the moonlight
This is a story as you know..Umm..no idea what else to say but..hope you enjoy ^_^
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Elleyd
:3
on July 02, 2014
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The_Panda_Otaku
^.^
on July 02, 2014
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Elleyd
Good luck and good writing!
on July 01, 2014
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The_Panda_Otaku
Thanks ^.^ and kk
on July 01, 2014
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Elleyd
A very interesting monster story. It seems like if it heads down the path intended for it, it could turn out very well. This story of the traditional monsters will definitely become popular as the characters remain human and well developed. With the ominous MHA as the clear BBEG this story has a strong and interesting conflict and is unlike any other story on See More▼
on June 30, 2014
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on June 30, 2014
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Matchmaker
Matchmaker
Heather is an 16 year old girl who just moved from Georgia. As she starts a new school, she makes three unlikely friends. When te Fall Festival comes along, Candy, Coraline, and Tracy want to repay the favor by finding Heather a perfect match.
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Elleyd
on July 02, 2014
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Kisume
kk
on July 02, 2014
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Elleyd
PM would be best!
on July 02, 2014
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Kisume
thanks! I'll make sure i will! should i private message, post on your wall, or here?
on July 02, 2014
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Elleyd
yes dark is what I was going for so just say dark [when you say primitive it means unfinished or amateurish or bad] and yea i am reviewing a review cuz i want to make sure you aren't telling people bad reviews; so you have earned the right to review; before you post though please send the review to me so I can approve! Thanks and Congratulations!
on July 02, 2014
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on June 30, 2014
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Awesome I love honest reviewers.
The Legacy of DnP.

that's my story
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Elleyd
Once you get past the grammar and a confusing setting, this story is one filled with action and adventure! With good characters, this story makes a strong impression. A fun lightness is cast about the story by the odd yet entertaining narration and perspective. If you're looking for a story that has slots of battles or things happening aka action, this is a good See More▼
on July 02, 2014
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on June 30, 2014
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It isn't done yet, can u plz review?!

http://www.qfeast.com/story/lt000I/The-Matchmaker
The Matchmaker
The Matchmaker
Lindsay started her 9th grade year as a regular student, but then she starts a blog that helps people in her school find their true match, but she has a secret... She has never been in a relationship.
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Elleyd
@JeweledOwl812 very good note
on July 03, 2014
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CrystalDiamond2323
@JeweledOwl812 yep! The principal is weirdo
on July 03, 2014
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JeweledOwl812
@CrystalDiamond2323 A great story, focused on coming-of-age and middle school life. It is realistic and relatable. I love the Matchmaker blog idea. Thumbs up!

Note: I cannot seem to grasp where the plot is going. What is the problem? The climax? The solution? And so on...

P.S: the principal is so weird...LOL
on July 03, 2014
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Elleyd
My pleasure.
on June 30, 2014
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CrystalDiamond2323
Thanks!
on June 30, 2014
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on June 30, 2014
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http://www.qfeast.com/story/YWprPl/A-Week-In-the-Life Please review my story. It's not done yet.
A Week In the Life
A Week In the Life
Dive into a normal week for six sixth graders. Actually, I lied. Nothing about this week is normal, because Friday is the 7th grade dance! Peek into the perspectives of Avery, Emma, Lexi, Aaron, Cliff, and Ian! Updates every day!
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Elleyd
Thank you and really all I want is for your guys' writing to be the best it can be
on June 30, 2014
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JeweledOwl812
I completely understand. I'm glad your honest about it
on June 30, 2014
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Elleyd
just saying
on June 30, 2014
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JeweledOwl812
Oh! Opps!
on June 30, 2014
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Elleyd
A classic teen romance, full of confusion and twists that bring this complex story to life. By looking into every character's point of view, which there are many (maybe too many for some's taste but regardless), you get the real feeling of a teen's thought process. This is a good story to read if you are looking for some insight on the drama in a teen's world. See More▼
on June 30, 2014
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on June 30, 2014
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A Gamer's Wish
A Gamer's Wish
So your probbaly wondering... This story is probbaly going to suck (well atleast i hope not :() anyways to the story! So its 2024 and for some reason people are still obsessed with VIDEO GAMES! And now theres this new console that alows you to be in the game... Jeez i guess thats a gamer's wish... DESCLAIMER ITS NOT A RIP OFF OF SAO :| (its just like it and yes you do get to log out)
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Elleyd
thanks
on June 30, 2014
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TheSmolKookieMonster
thank you for reviewing.. Hehe i'll try to stop the Jeez word xD
on June 30, 2014
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Elleyd
A Gamer's Wish is a fun, light-hearted story which makes for a good comedy. With lots of detail on the literal video game world, gamers will surely enjoy the realness of this tale. Despite shaky grammar and overuse of the word Jeez, this is a playful story that is a good story to read when looking for something light but still interesting.
on June 30, 2014
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on June 30, 2014
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http://www.qfeast.com/story/55c7b4/New-Girl-1

The story isn't done yet, can you review it so far?
New Girl (1)
New Girl (1)
Dawn is the new girl. Will she make friends at her new school? More importantly, what will happen when she becomes (Extremely good-looking) Brandon's neighbor?
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Elleyd
Excellent! I am excited to read it!
on July 04, 2014
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MockingjayDistrict
I have thought of a perfect ending. Once I finish the party (1 more chapter) I have to say one more thing (1 chapter) then the epilogue (1 chapter)
on July 03, 2014
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Elleyd
@JeweledOwl812 That's a good idea like a concluding chapter
on July 03, 2014
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JeweledOwl812
@ElleyD @MockingjayDistrict ElleyD is right. People will get bored if you just keep on adding OC's while the plot has already been resolved...maybe 3 or 4 more chapters to wrap up your story
on July 03, 2014
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Elleyd
10 chapters isn't soon
on July 03, 2014
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on June 30, 2014
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