shanked

also the new glasses place didn’t have my octagon frames<\3 my new ones make me look a bit like zooey deschanel tjo

few more small updates:
-two offers on trailer and another cash offer tomorrow hopefully. hopefully back in chi soon!!!
-once i’m back i’m goin vegetarian lol
-still songwriting, though melodically i’ve hit a wall
-saw an optician today, vision has worsened by .25 in the left eye and .50 in the right
-ive rediscovered my love for reading

if u can actually read through lolita and not be disgusted in the slightest i do not trust u

started reading lolita today and it gave me a panic attack

brew dumb bitch moment of the day: fot high, forgot i’m pollotarian, ate pepperoni pizza.

bucket list:
1. have mind blowing sex to florence and the machine
2. kill myself

hot take: no books should be banned, however many should be STRICTLY age restricted. there are just so many books out there that will literally alter the chemistry of impressionable young minds. ae: lolita by nabokov. y do 14 years olds read this and act like its NOT one of the most disgusting things ever written. legit used to know a girl who always compared herself 2 dolores and started going by “dolly” because of it (dolly is a cute nickname but AFTER THAT BOOK????) (if ur See More▼ not familiar with it lolita is a twisted **psychological horror story** about a man who kidnaps and rapes his 12 year old stepdaughter, written from the perspective of the man)

yes. i am wishing ill upon you. you know who you are. you sent me death threats!!!!

things r so bad.

ate some frozen strawberries today. slowly but surely starting to like more fruits. i’m currently pollotarian (aka vegetarian except for chicken) but eventually i want to try full vegetarianism

god forbid i ever have children (i do Not want them) they will not be allowed complete access on the internet until they’re 15. they will play outside and read books and eat dirt idk

this is so embarrassing but when i was in middle school nobody told me you could get acne on places other than ur face and i used to get it on my arms and back and i’d pick at it and i fully believed the white string that came out was worms and i had worms in my blood stream

i feel like making lists tonight so. here’s a list of stupid things my emetophobia has made me do
-i hardly ever use public restrooms bc i’m SO scared someone will come in and throw up
-in fifth grade some kid threw up bc he ate milk and cereal and was lactose intolerant and i refused to go back in the classroom for the rest of the day
-during flu season i scrub my hands. raw
-ran into my friend/situationship in an elevator. he brought up that he was sick and i freaked out See More▼ ab it. legitimately panicking bc i was scared he had some sort of stomach virus and id catch it. he later informed me that he just had a cold and i ended up bringing him cough drops and it made me look really stupid.
-my high school crush tried to hug me at my senior prom and i refused bc he’d j been sick. he wasn’t even really sick. he’d mixed a bunch of different alcohols and it made him sick. even still i told him no and i feel awful ab it looking back bc he was so tired and upset because he wanted to go home but like 🤕
-legitimately will fast for 72 hours if i think i’d been exposed to something.

ranking concerts ive been to

1. mustard service: my fav band and best concert of all time, made some friends, got high, not only did i get to meet the band, their drummer winked at me several times and i got the setlist and got it signed
2. elton john: actually life changing. it was ELTON JOHN and i had decent seats. was planning to go w a guy but he couldn’t get tickets.
3. black midi: LOVED the concert however the guy i went with ended up running into another friend of his See More▼ and they ran off together. fortunately i was w my best friend too so we had fun but tbh that kinda messed up the whole experience.
4. crywank prob ab equal to BM. i prefer bm to crywank but both times i saw them i had a better experience apart from that. also i got to meet crywank + after the second time i saw them me and my friends had a smoke sesh in the park and raided a 7-11 at midnight
5. trans siberian orchestra: idk i was w my parents and i was having a panic attack the whole time bc i was scared someone was gonnna throw up or smth. my dad tripped the guitar player by accident.

brewlifeupdates:
-still in ohio atm but i found an apartment in a small neighborhood j south of the loop. as soon as i have the money for the initial fee i’m moving back
-still dealing w whatever horrid cough thing i have but it’s no longer insufferable.
-started talking to someone else they’re real cute and make cool music. my harem keeps expanding
-super into kafka rn

one year ago today i said goodbye to the person who inspired some of my favorite songs that i’ve written. i’m notorious for getting around; but truly, i find it hard to settle for anything else knowing it might not be as perfect as what i had with this person. i loved him like art and he loved me like a dog.

guys my type pattern has been broken this is insane (it literally hasn’t, it is yet another european musician who wears big sweaters and listens to nerd music) (the only difference is that this time they’re a singer and not a bassist or guitarist)