Eyeless Jack (1)

Mitch tries to fall asleep at his brother's house. But he falls asleep. When his brother sees him, he gasps and drops his coffee cup what happened?

published on June 23, 201698 reads 38 readers 9 not completed
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Eyeless Jack (1)
Chapter 2.

Sam's.

I packed my bags, quickly and ran out the door. My hair dried as I ran, from the hot nice shower. I smiled, and waved to everyone. I hopped into my car, and began to drive. As I listened to radio, it said "a man going around with a blue mask on the loose! Be careful at night!" It announced.
I didn't care. It would be so rare for me to get attacked. I happily walked to Sam's door and whistled. I knocked twice, hard. "Sam!!! It's Mitch!" I called.
Sam answered, and smiled big. "Hello, Mitch! Welcome!" He hugged me.
I dropped my bags, and hugged him tightly. "Five years!" I cried.
"Yup." Replied Sam, smiling and crying tears of joy.
He lead me to my room. "here's your room, Mitchell!" He smiled, and pointed to the room.
I ran inside and flew onto the bed. I started unpacking my stuff. I didn't have too much, to be honest.
Still I was gonna have the best time ever!!!
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Comments (9)

EyelessJannet
Jack rocks
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on March 30, 2020
Wolf_Girl
jack got him
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on March 14, 2020
KylieTheKiller
Did Jack take Sam's kidneys to make him die?
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on August 03, 2017
irony
It's a nice story, aside from a few grammar errors. But what happens next? It's kind of confusing?
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Lucy_Heartfilia
I know there is grammar errors.. But this is what I found online and it made NO SENSE. So I tried my best to make it by myself.
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on June 28, 2016
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on June 28, 2016
Lucy_Heartfilia
Thanks. @Dei_Dei
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on June 24, 2016
Dei_Dei
I like how this story is going, and how you lay it out too, but here is some advice:
If there are two people having a conversation, you don't need to bother putting "said" at the end of each time a person speaks. E.g
"How was your day?" Sam asked.
"Not good."
"Why?" See More▼
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Lucy_Heartfilia
Thanks. But whenever I usually read I find it hard to read it and find out whose talking. I thought others would think the same. But thanks for the wonderful, and more convenient advice!
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Dei_Dei
haha to tell you the truth, it does make it a little easier to read- however with the advice I gave you, you'll look like a professional writer in no time.
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on June 24, 2016
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on June 23, 2016
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on June 23, 2016