Two knights and a princess

Two knights and a princess

im thinking of publishing this into a book... please let me know what you think! Id really love to hear your comments... how can I make it better? Or is it good for a first book

published on August 28, 201314 reads 9 readers 5 not completed
Chapter 1.

The battle the started it all


Chapter 1                 The Battle That Started It All

The hot brutal sun heated up the young knights armour. He grabbed his sword and knocked down his opponent. His opponent fell in the dry sand of the jousting arena. “slam” The body hit the cruel ground. Full of sweat the winner looked around the jousting arena. Thousands of people screamed his name.
- Felix! Felix! Felix!
He smiled and waved to the people of the crowed. The young man ran over to his closest mate Jack who was waiting his turn to duel the winner.
- Looks like your looking at the king of duelling, Jack! Felix chuckled.
Jack stood up and gave a huge push to his friend who had landed on the ground, he then took a good laughed. It was a cruel joke but brought a smile to Jacks face for particularly no reason. Even if his best mate was in pain…
The next duel began and the two lads ran to their corners of the arena. The first man to run was Jacks, Felix then followed. All that was heard was the sounds of their swords hitting, metal to metal was heard through out the whole arena. Jack green eyes glared in the sunlight. His long black hair was as dark as the Shadow Lands that supposedly lied in the Valley Of The Dead. That valley was not so far from the arena.
But he also had a very perky attitude which threw of the thought of darkness when you looked at his scared up posture. Felix had dirty blond hair and with his brown eyes that made him look like his father. Lord Aro was a cruel man he was. Felix had short hair and the top of his bangs were all ways in his face almost blocking his view.
Felix hit his opponent as hard as he could and Jack fell back to the ground. It wasn’t long until Jack noticed he had fallen.
- Beat me if you can! Laughed Felix at his companion on the desert sand. Jack got up furiously and kicked Felix in the chest with all his strength. Once Felix was in slight pain Jack then stood before him and took out his sword slashed him in the left arm and then knocked him to the ground with his shield. The blond haired knight was laying on the ground in incredible pain…
I thought this would have been more of a friendly duel then violent. Since I know Jack well and have been best mates since I can remember! He thought to him self.
-Felix is done! The voice screeched through out the arena for a second time.
Felix slowly looked at the sky. Lying still the sandy arena. He had fallen into the valley of pain, blood dripped from the young knights mouth and arm, into the yellow sand witch formed a small stream growing bigger as the crimson fluid left his body. The crowed had started to leave the arena already. Besides the duel was over and they got what they came for… Violence. Jack rushed to Felix!
- Haha, beat you! Jack laughed and then helped the other knight up. Felix pushed his friend into the stands and laughed.
- That’s what you get. Felix was playful and looked over into the stands of the opposite direction and saw a cloaked figure. It was staring right at him. A man. He wasn’t old maybe around 23 but no older. He was actually as young as Felix him self.
-Who could that be? He wondered
-Hurry up Felix! We’re going to be late for the feast! Felix shook his head and looked back at the stands. The figure had vanished into midair.
- Very odd! He whispered to him self and ran over to Jack.
-Did you not see that also? He asked his friend curiously.
- See what? There is nothing here! We are the last ones. I don’t feel like playing your little games again Felix!
Jack was older and treated Felix like a younger sibling. Some times that got Felix very irritated.
- Its not a game! I’m telling you there was someone here that was not welcomed…
-Sure… I believe you! Jacks interrupted and his face went sad then he busted out laughing.
- You explain then why there was a cloaked person over there sitting on the stands staring at me! As if they were watching my every move and taking notes on it!
- There was no cloaked person, No magical unicorns… Nothing! Now get it together and lets go. We will be late for the feast… again! Jack sighed and then go on his white horse named Lyrexal. Named after Jacks desist father.
They rushed out of the arena that was now empty.
Felix still had the thought of the cloaked figure. He was almost destine to find out what it was, or better yet who! The young boys started their way back to the castle. In the woods, trees the size of giants danced in the howling winds. There path was long and cold. Falcons flew over the young knights heads like baby birds just learning to take flight. Eventually the tall brick kingdom the colours of a phoenix was seen in the distance. As the approached the mighty kingdom the bigger it grew. Once they arrived, they  got of their horses and started their way to the castles entrance.
- Late again are we? A guard mocked them.
- Its none of your business. Jack often acted like he ruled the guards.
- Alright then! The guard bowed and started to laugh again.
-The king will have your heads! He continued. The men didn’t turn around to see the expression on the guards face. They were in a hurry to get to the table before the king noticed his two best knights were missing. Like the last feast they had. Jack and Felix  got lost in the woods and didn’t return until 3 days after the feast. They had to clean the horse stables for a full year to repay there nobility.
Once you entered the castle there were swords that laid on the left wall from some of the greatest knights of Draconica. History was a strong part of the society in Draconica. Inside the dining room they ate in was the size of about 500 horses put together. The king was standing when Jack walked into the room. Felix had quickly went up to his room to change when he found a small splinter of paper on his bed. The note read: Arthur died. T’was for pride. There is no were left to hide. The newly crowned king will be killed. Unless his destiny is fulfilled!
There was also a blood stain on the letter. What did this mean? Why did he get the note. He was no prince or king. So what was all this about a crown. This made him wonder. Could this of had to do with the cloaked man he saw earlier? Felix put the letter in his bag and quickly ran down stairs. The feast had already started. The knight quickly ran over to his seat that was beside the princess since he was the most loyal knight. Rose and Felix had been close friends since he could remember.
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Comments (5)

on July 17, 2014
Eh. Ummm...

on July 17, 2014
It's amazing:3
on April 29, 2014
on October 23, 2013
Good story, I can't wait for more
on August 28, 2013