Need Critique on this bit.
Blackness poured itself onto the empty desert. Blood spilled from the young woman's injured head, dribbling onto the grains of sand below and staining them a crimson hue. She glanced over at the prince who treaded beside her. "M-Matthew..." She winced. "Can we rest here...?"
Prince Matthew sighed and shook his head. "We're in the middle of the desert, Bean. We'll freeze to death!....Bean?"
Breathing a sigh of exhaustion, she collapsed onto the sandy See More ground.
"Ugh, you're unbelievable. Sleeping in a place like this....Just like a kid..." Matthew sighed, pulling a woolen blanket over her sleeping form.
"Though... Aren't we all just children? Autumn...You...I? Caught up in our parents' wars?"
The prince placed a hand on the sleeping woman's shoulder.
"Heh...How convenient..."
Blackness poured itself onto the empty desert. Blood spilled from the young woman's injured head, dribbling onto the grains of sand below and staining them a crimson hue. She glanced over at the prince who treaded beside her. "M-Matthew..." She winced. "Can we rest here...?"
Prince Matthew sighed and shook his head. "We're in the middle of the desert, Bean. We'll freeze to death!....Bean?"
Breathing a sigh of exhaustion, she collapsed onto the sandy See More ground.
"Ugh, you're unbelievable. Sleeping in a place like this....Just like a kid..." Matthew sighed, pulling a woolen blanket over her sleeping form.
"Though... Aren't we all just children? Autumn...You...I? Caught up in our parents' wars?"
The prince placed a hand on the sleeping woman's shoulder.
"Heh...How convenient..."
luckpup
I know I'm late, but this sounds great just make sure to keep your readers engaged, and don't get too cliche, or confusing.<3
on August 31, 2016
on August 01, 2016
My fan is blowing air that smells like burnt pizza. Should I be worried?
on August 01, 2016
*melts into a puddle of pumpkin soup*
http://whistle-trill.deviantart.com/art/LoZ-LinkxReader-Newlywed-Adventure-479369432
http://whistle-trill.deviantart.com/art/LoZ-LinkxReader-Newlywed-Adventure-479369432
on August 01, 2016
I like farming, i like farming
How about you? How about you?
Lot of things to roll in, lots of things to roll in
Like cow poo.
Like cow poo.
How about you? How about you?
Lot of things to roll in, lots of things to roll in
Like cow poo.
Like cow poo.
on August 01, 2016
What were our first words to each other?
on August 01, 2016
on August 01, 2016
i want a pet deku scrub.
on August 01, 2016
does a legy
on August 01, 2016
I can't believe that I'm calling someone out but
@Reventheous
It's time to stop. You're freaking filling my feed with porn. Yeah, I know that you're doing it "Ironically", but it's not funny anymore. It's just gross and annoying. Nobody wants to see that..
@Reventheous
It's time to stop. You're freaking filling my feed with porn. Yeah, I know that you're doing it "Ironically", but it's not funny anymore. It's just gross and annoying. Nobody wants to see that..
on August 01, 2016
on August 01, 2016
breann.west.5 added a photo to the starred list
So, my local Dollar Store has stocked up on nightnare fuel.
7
on August 01, 2016
on August 01, 2016
on July 31, 2016