Yourlocalcatperson - Page 169

Dis dude called his girlfriend a ketchup packet while she was on her period ? I can't even

Me: MELOOON >:3
My sister: Water?
Me: NOOOO

Me: Imma get some pants on
Wolf Spider: HAH SURPRISE ASSHOLE
Me: *screaming like a little girl and drops pants*

School starts tomorrow and I am next level angry

Too late for breakfast
Time to break my fast with Salt and Noodles

I just remembered something from when I was with my ex gf Madison, I had brought some sushi for lunch (don't question it) and I had a big old thing of wasabi. We kept looking at it like "mm that looks good" So we split that shit in half and each took half, put that in out mouth and swallowed. Next thing I knew she was turning bright red and I was turning red as well (so she says) and my friends were all wondering what we have done and we were laughing like idiots at our stupidity See More though I must say, that was some good wasabi that we had shared. Just remembered it since it was on the first day of highschool (technically first couple weeks) ever and I go back tomorrow hope she's doing okay..

Me: *asks a retorihical question*
YouTube commenters: oh I know the awnser!
Me: Yeah me too

EVIL EMPEROR ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?

Niko: Sam I'm going to the hospital
Me: What happened??
Niko: I can't see when I blink
Me (gullible idiot): oh no that's not good!
Niko: Get it ?
Me: *takes a minute* NIKO I SWEAR TO GOD

Well karma just bit me in the ass

Me: *types a smartass remark* haha this won't ever send
Also me: *accidentally hits send* shit

Dude my friend just ratted himself out. He found out he could cast vids on the living room TV and since his grandma was normally in there he decided to do it to troll her by playing vids from the office and Henry Stickman's distraction dance
She was just confused and he told her and now he can't do it for a long time