New laws propose schools be banned to prevent school shootings
NEW law makers decided today that schools would begin to be demolished and banned in order to prevent the epidemic of school shootings from furthering America into an educationless oblivion. Illinois was selected as the test state for this new practice. City counsilman Hugh Lambambo of Chicago had been suggesting it for years, but it wasn't until 2:05 pm on January 23rd 2020 that his idea was finally approved.Lambambo brought up this fair point last week which likely pushed many doubtful law makers in favor of his proposal. "Think about it, guns get banned and some macho bad guy still comes in guns a-blazing. Kids get banned and whores still drop them on the street to be raised by the government. Schools get banned, well... those can't be snuck into the country now can they? And if any damn construction workers want to build one, I say we ban them too. Schools cannot only never be returned to our country, but sold to countries I don't like. If schools don't exist, there can't be more mass shootings involving our punctilious youth because it is indisputably impossible to shoot up non-existant places. This is very much the reason Australia has never reported a mass shooting."
He was applauded for his speech which consequently caused Lambambo to reportedly smile for the first time in 20 some years.
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