September 29th, 1860
"Oh, but you must go, Roarke! This shall be a once in a lifetime thing!” Vivienne said to me. “You will have tons of fun there! please, go with us!”I sighed softly. The party was later tonight and I was the only one who didn’t want to go. Edith was the most excited about it. She loved getting out and talking to people. Overall she was just a very cheerful person who, sometimes, gets ahead of herself. I loved that about her, though.
“Yes, you must go with us!” Edith said excitedly.
“Don't you want to go and meet a cute girl?” Lillian asked teasingly.
“No. I do not want to go to this party” I said sheepishly.
Edith let out a little hmph sound and frowned at me. Josephine got up and brushed her hands down her gray dress a couple times and started for the door. Lillian got up and followed her. Vivienne and Edith both just sat on my bed looking at me while I turned back to the sketchbook I had opened on the table. They remained silent for a good few minutes, leaving me to think about how I was going to go about this sketch.
“We'll stop asking,” Edith said with a soft giggle.
I leaned back in the seat at my desk and looked up at the ceiling in defeat and let out a sigh. It was always hard to say no to Edith. She was just so happy all the time that it felt weird to tell her no to doing stuff I didn’t want to do. And maybe it has to do with the fact that she’s my little sister, too, I suppose. She tended to always get her way without even trying. Man oh man, why was I always letting this happen to me?
I looked back at Vivienne and Edith, smiled softly and held my hands up in defeat like I always did when they got their way with me. Huge smiles spread across their faces immediately. Edith jumped off my bed and hugged me around my neck, almost choking me. Vivienne let out a little squeal of joy and hopped off the bed. Tippet, who had been laying beside her the entire time, leapt up when she squealed. The hairy black mutt stared at her for a moment before curling back up and laying down again with a small huff. Sometimes, I just wished that I were that dog.
“I'll go to this damn party for you. But don't expect me to stay the whole night.” I told the giggling girls.
Edith let go of me and ran out of the room yelling about how I finally agreed to go with Vivienne trailing after her. I just shook my head with a smirk and went back to drawing in the sketchbook on my desk. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to get out of the house tonight. The only place I’ve ever really gone was out to the woods or into town every once in a while to get a new book or two. That was more than fine with me, though. I didn't need much else to keep me happy.
I glanced up at the clock on the wall quickly. It was only three in the afternoon. I still had a few hours before I needed to get ready, thankfully. There was no doubt that my mother was helping them get their corsets on already. I never understood why the girls liked fancy parties, to be honest. They don’t seem that interesting at all. They seem too formal to be considered a party, in my opinion.
“Well, whatever makes them happy,” I mumbled to myself.
I glanced at Tippet for a moment, then scoffed. “You’re lucky, I swear, Tippet. “
The dog looked up at me with his miraculous brown eyes that were almost too human for a dog like him. He stared up at me with affection when I said his name and his long tail wagged, too. I reached over to him to pat him on the head twice. He gave my hand a quick lick when I pulled away to continue on the portrait that I was drawing of Vivienne. It was as if he were trying to give me some type of encouragement. It was comforting to say at the very least.
I turned back to the sketchbook and continued on that portrait of Vivienne, drawing darker markings here for her hair, lighter markings there for her heart shaped face. It was coming together really well. The more I sketched her features out, the more it looked like her. In the sketch, her black hair was up in a bun which was braided. In her hair was her favorite baby blue butterfly hair pins and to go with it, matching earrings. She had a faint smile on her small lips in the image I had drawn out in my sketchbook. It was already starting to look absolutely perfect.
After a couple hours of drawing the portrait of Vivienne, I had to light a candle. The sun had started to go down finally, making the room go dark. I was just finishing up the last part of the portrait sketch that I wanted to work on before closing the little book and placing it in the top drawer of the desk swiftly. I could already hear Mother calling for me from downstairs, anyway.
“Roarke, we're ready to leave! Are you coming with us?” Mother yelled from downstairs.
I got up and crossed my room in one stride to open the door to peek my head out into the hall, then called out,” No, go without me. I shall meet you there.”
“Oh, alright. Do make it quick!” Mother called out again. I heard the front door squeak as they left for the party. I went back into my room, shutting the door behind me softly, and walked over to the closet where my fancy clothes were. It was just a basic black suit that most men my age probably had. It was neatly hung on the rack. I took it out of the closet and started changing into it immediately. When I had finished getting dressed and had slipped the shoes on, I stepped up to the mirror to take a quick look at myself to see if I looked decent enough to even attend. I used the brush that was sitting on top of the dresser to brush my hair back how I normally wore it when I was out in public. When I wasn't in public, my hair was wild and free rather than brushed back and neat. This was as decent as it’s going to get, I suppose.
I walked to the desk that was under the window in front of my bed and opened the top drawer to grab my sketchbook and shove it in my pocket before closing it and heading out of the house and to the stables where my stallion Balias stood. I could see his eyes in the night light up when he saw me walking towards him. I grabbed his saddle and placed it on his back neatly, then grabbed a couple apples from the barrel and shoved those in his saddle bag. Balias whinnied happily when I opened the stable door for him. Swiftly, I hoisted myself up onto the saddle on his back and we were off. Balias,then, dashed through the night and down the pathway that led away from our home. The breeze whipped through the black stallion's hair as he ran. Every time I rode this horse I felt a sense of freedom. It was one of the best feelings I’ve experienced in the world.
Balias continued running down the path as if he knew exactly where to go. When the trees started thinning out, he ran even faster. When I was younger, me and my brother Jace would always race our horses to see which one was faster. Balias always won out of the two, so it was nice to see that Balias still had that same energy from when he was younger, too. He’s starting to get on up there in his age, unfortunately. He wasn't as fast as he used to be, but he was still petty damn fast.
After a couple minutes Balias started slowing down when a white mansion came into view. I gave the back of his neck a few pats just right beside his shiny black mane. The closer to the mansion we got the slower Balias ran, up until he was in a slow gallop. From a distance I could hear the sounds of a piano, violins, and a cello. I already wanted to just turn back around and head straight home. Just for an hour, I told myself. You just need to stay for an hour and you’re free to go home. It’ll be okay.
It was well lit up with candles everywhere. Friendly faces greeted us, some people waved at us, and there was a murmur of voices all around. I led Balias to one of the hitching posts nearby and tied the reins to it. I gave the top of Balias’s head a quick scratch between the ears before turning to the grand porch. People were walking through the doors and being greeted by an older woman who I assumed to be Mrs. Cooper. She had her graying blond hair tied up in a bun and was in a stylish white dress with a dark green trim around the bottom of it. She smiled at each individual person who walked forward and greeted them with a curtsy. How proper, I though.
I looked around to see if I could find any of my family, but to no avail. They must already be inside, I thought. A young woman off to the left in my peripheral vision started waving towards me. I glanced at her and she smiled at me, raised her hand up again and waved once more. She had on a very fancy red satin ballroom dress. Around the shoulders of the dress were white lace frills. A pendant hung from around her neck and the gloves she wore were the same material as the lace on her dress to match. She stared at me with her icy blue eyes and her platinum blond hair curled down to her shoulders neatly.
I nodded to her once and turned to Mrs. Cooper. I headed up the stairs casually to go find my family. Mrs. Cooper curstyed and greeted me with a warm welcoming smile. I smiled back at her, grabbed her hand, and kissed the top of it swiftly. Her hazel eyes lit up at that.
“Welcome to our humble abode, Mr…Er, what should I call you?” She asked
“I go by Roarke, ma’am.”
“Well, it’s nice to meet you young man. It’s not every day you see someone as respectful as you.” She said happily.
“Well, don’t let me keep you, now. Go on. Enjoy yourself.” She said with a smile while gesturing for me to proceed through the doors of her beautiful mansion.
With that being said I walked straight into the mansion and stopped in my tracks. It was so spacious. There were people all around. The music was louder now, and a song I didn't recognize was being played. There was a grand staircase in the center leading up to the second floor where more people spoke to one another or made their way through to other rooms. The mansion foyer was well decorated, as well. Paintings of people hung on the walls, A fireplace was on one side of the main room, fancy chairs in front of that with a flower vase sitting neatly on a end table between the two chairs, and on the other side of the foyer was the entrance to, what I assumed to be, the dining room. Beyond that was probably the kitchen.
I made my way through the people, scanning the crowd trying to find one of my siblings or my mother and father. I spotted Zachariah talking to a woman with light brown hair. I couldn’t see what she looked like, though, as her back was turned to me. I didn’t want to ruin that conversation for him, so I continued up the wooden staircase up to the next floor. It wasn’t hard to get by people since I was tall enough for most people to see me. They all just scooted out of the way to let me by, and it got me a few looks from some of the women. For the few women that waved at me, I briefly acknowledged them with a simple head nod and continued on. How much longer until I get to leave, I asked myself in annoyance.
I continued forward until I made my way to the ballroom. I peeked my head into the entrance and, immediately, the first person I spotted was my sister Josephine. She was dancing with a man I had never seen before, so she didn’t even see me. The ballroom was well decorated, just like the mansion foyer, with pictures of people hanging on the walls, flowers here and there, and fancy crystal chandeliers to light up the entire room. This is where the music was coming from. The musicians were composing a typical polka song. There were colors of every kind twirling with the music. Everyone in the room was holding a smile and having the time of their lives. It looked absolutely exhilarating.
I left the ballroom and went back downstairs again and found Jace sitting in one of the chairs I saw earlier. I made my way over to him and sat down in the chair on the right of him, sighing as I sat.
“Are you enjoying yourself,” Jace asked me over the music.
I replied,” Yeah, it’s okay. It’s not something I would want to do again anytime soon, of course.”
And, to my surprise, I was enjoying myself just a small bit, even though all I did was walk through some of the rooms and take a quick look around. This wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I would much rather, still, be at home working on that portrait of Vivienne I had almost finished, however.
Jace laughed at that statement. I just gave him a small smile and stared at the lit fireplace.
“So I take it you didn’t meet anyone that you fancy.” Jace said jokingly.
I only glanced at him very briefly before looking back at the fireplace again. “No, I only came here to get our lovely sisters to stop pestering me about coming. I’m not staying for very long.”
“Brother, you should go talk to some of the ladies here! There sure are a lot of them. We don’t live forever.” he said.
“That’s very true,” I murmured. That didn't really bother me, though. I wasn't interested in romantic relationships at the moment.
While Jace and I talked, the girl in the red satin ballroom dress drifted by us. I glanced up at her to see that she was staring at me seriously. After a few seconds, Jace nudged me to get my attention. I turned to look at him and he mouthed the words,”go talk to her” slowly. I looked back to her and she waved at me. It wouldn't hurt to talk to other people, I suppose.
I sighed, got myself out of the chair, and walked over to her. Her eyes lit up when she noticed that I was walking in her direction. Her small mouth spread into a smile. Her head barely reached my chin when standing next to her. I could already feel the regret washing over me.
“Well, hello there,” she said in a higher pitched voice. “I see you finally come to speak to me.”
“Yeah,” I replied sheepishly. “I want to start off by saying that my name is Roarke, ma’am.”
She smiled. “Well, what a lovely name you have, Mr. Roarke. I’m Luella. I’m delighted to meet you. “
She began to walk in the direction of the front door, so naturally, I followed her. She was the one doing most of the talking for the most part, which was more than okay with me. She would ask me a question every now and then, though, and I would give her a short answer or explanation.
“So how come I’ve never seen you before, Mr. Roarke? You claim you’ve lived here for all your life,” she asked with a coy glance up at me.
“I don’t leave the house very often unless it’s to go hunting with my father or to go into town every once in a while,” I said.
“Oh, how peculiar,” she said. “What is it that you go into town for?”
I shrugged. “I mostly go there for books, really. But sometimes Mother needs something and she’ll send me to go get it for her if I’m home.”
“Oh, that’s very sweet of you, Mr. Roarke.” she said softly. She had led us to the porch swing. She Sat down first and waited for me to sit. When I didn’t, she took her delicate hand in that white lace glove and patted the space beside her twice, gesturing for me to sit beside her. I hesitated for some reason, but finally sat beside her. She pursed her lips and looked up at me.
“So…Where do you live, exactly?” She asked.
“We live down that way. Take that path and stay on it for a bit and you’ll get to our house in several minutes on horseback.” I told her while pointing her in the exact direction.
“Oh! My daddy buys crops from your folk! I only went there one time with him. It was about a month ago, actually.” She said happily. She placed her hand on top of mine.
“Yeah, that was probably a time when I was down at the library buying me a new book.” I said quietly.
She giggled at that, for some reason, then continued talking with her soft voice. “So, you’re a scholar? Or…”
“I suppose if you would like to call it that…” I trailed off.
She narrowed her eyes ever so slightly and leaned towards me. I stood up instead, which clearly caught her off guard. I, then, offered her my hand. She looked at me carefully for a moment with those icy blue eyes of hers before she hesitantly took it and stood up. I knew exactly what she was trying to do, and unfortunately I wasn’t into her that way. It made me feel a little guilty that I couldn't reciprocate those feelings.
“Shall we go do something else?” I asked when she grasped onto my arm as we walked side by side back into the mansion.
“Oh? Like what,” she asked with a giggle.
I didn’t even know what we could do, to be honest. I hadn’t even thought that far ahead yet in hopes that she would reject the offer. There must have been something like a chess board or a piano.
That's exactly what I could do. I could play the piano that was in the ballroom. The music was still playing from whoever was playing it, but I immediately started heading to the massive room in which it resided. I could feel Luella hot on my trail as she called after me and asked what I was doing. I turned to face her and gestured to the ballroom.
"I'm going to play the piano," I said with a smile.
“You can play that?” she asked skeptically.
“Yes. I’ve practiced for ages now. We have one back at the farmhouse that I used to play and practice on.” I said.
Why I had the bright idea of playing in front of everyone was beyond me, but if it got me away from Luella for a few moments then that was fine with me. I was flattered that she was interested in me, but I just couldn't reciprocate those feelings. I do hope she finds someone who can give her that sort of attention, though. She seemed like a sweet lady, too, and she was really beautiful, so there would be someone who wanted to give her the attention she wanted from me.
I took two steps up the staircase when I heard a loud ear piercing shriek from the right. Everyone in the foyer snapped their heads in the direction of the sound, myself included. The sound came from down the hall and it sounded very familiar. I’ve only heard one person scream exactly like that and she did it because Jace had fallen from a tree and hit his head on the ground and she thought he had died. That sounded exactly like my mother’s scream.
I pushed by other people and rushed down the hall checking each room until I found where the scream had come from and what I saw had me frozen in my tracks.
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