A narrative

A narrative

I have to write a narrative in my English class and I was wondering if this was good. Let me know in the comments plz.

published on October 22, 20165 reads 4 readers 2 completed
Chapter 1.

The only chapter in this narrative

Haunted Horrors
        Ring. Ring. Ring. I walked over to the phone and picked it up.
        “Hello?” I asked “This is Emma Speaking.”
        “Hey! Emma, it’s Audrey. Do you have any plans on Monday?” She asked.
        Doesn’t this girl have a calendar? I thought. “yes I do have plans, Audrey, Monday is Halloween and I plan on trick-or-treating and scaring people. Why do you ask?”
        “Well you see there is this Haunted House in town called Nights of Horror and I really wanted to go but my problem is, well no one wants to go with me and I do not want to go alone.” She said, all in one sentence.
        “Well can’t you go another night? You know I hate scary things.”
        “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! It’s just Halloween night! Please, please, please go with me” Audrey whined like a 6-year-old child asking for ice cream to his mother.
        “Fine, I’ll go with you.” I regretted saying that right as the words left my mouth.
        “Wait, seriously?”  Audrey said shockingly. “I’ll go tell my mom.”
        I heard Audrey’s excited voice muffled in the background talking to her mom. “she said she’d go” I overheard. Audrey soon got back on the phone about a minute later. I had till 8:00 Pm on Monday till I met my impending doom. So much for free candy.
        On the night of Halloween, I got in my costume. I started trick-or-treating at 6:30 because I figured I could get some candy before the night of horrors.
        At 8:00 Pm, I was picked up by Audrey and her mom. We talked in the car about what happened that day and Audrey wouldn’t stop talking about how fun it would be.
        When we arrived my palms started to sweat. I rubbed it off and acted like I was okay, but on the inside I was screaming like a 6-year-old girl. But it turned out I was fine for the first ten minutes. Now, of course it was when we were purchasing our tickets and waiting in line.
        “I heard this place gave some kid nightmares for months last year” I overheard a teen saying to another. My palms were really sweaty now. I started to freak out a little. No. I can’t do this. Just turn around. Audrey will understand… yea. Just turn around. I thought. You don’t have to go. I had made up my mind. But just as I was about to turn around the line shifted and it was our turn to go inside the giant, horrific death trap. It was too late.
        I entered the house, clinging onto Audrey’s arm. It was pitch black until my eyes had adjusted, though, when they did there wasn’t an end in sight. I had to admit, I was scared for my life. It wasn’t like a startle-scared or an alarmed-scared, it was a full on death-scared. Audrey was enjoying all of it while I was on the lookout for any crazy psychopath that might start charging at me with a bloody knife.
        I was scared quite a few times but nothing was as scary as what would happen next. I saw a trail of bloody hands to my left and my head was immediately drawn to them. About a minute later, someone was watching us. I kept walking along, feeling someone behind me but not daring to look back.
        Audrey turned around and saw him. A tall, white masked man, with a devilish look in his eyes and a killer chainsaw was creeping behind us. He grunted and launched himself at me. And me being the scaredy-cat I was, I screamed at the top of my lungs and started running. The man kept on chasing me, though I had lost Audrey. I guess she decided it was every man for himself. I started looking for her while being chased. I must say I am very good at multitasking.
        Unfortunately, I tripped and stumbled. The masked man had caught up to me. I ran avoiding his chainsaw along the way. After a while I guess he had given up on his prey and went hunting for other innocent young adventurous souls. I stopped running when I realized this and caught my breath. I looked around, seeing a black figure hunched against the wall.
        I swear if this is another creepy psycho dude I am going to punch him square in the jaw. I thought. I balled my hands into fists and walked to the figure. “Who is that?” I asked, ready to throw a punch at any second.
        “Emma is that you? Its Audrey.” I relaxed a bit and unbaled my fists.
        “Yea it’s me. I’m so glad to see you.” I said walking over to her.
        “I could say the same thing.”
        We continued on, not wanting to waste twenty dollars. Also we couldn’t find an exit. We went through goblins, mummies, werewolves, bats, vampires, bloody legs and arms, and even Frankenstein. Thanks to my amazing eyesight and skills at finding exits in dangerous situations, I spotted a faint light. Audrey and I were excited, so we ran for it.
        Little did we know, one more surprise was waiting for us at the end. We were about 40 feet away from the exit when a big, blonde, curly-haired, sinister-smiled scarecrow launched at us.
        I screamed the loudest I have ever screamed in my life at that very moment. It was so loud I’m pretty sure everyone in the city could hear it. After that my vocal cords hurt like crazy and were sore.
        We continued on and walked out the exit without any more surprises. We called Audrey’s mom and she came and picked us up about 10 minutes later.
        “so how was it?” she asked
        “Awful and horrifying” I said in my raspy voice.
        “I can tell. Thank you so much for going with her though.”
        This time I just nodded my head as a gesture because my throat was in pure pain. I looked outside and saw the death trap fading in the distance, becoming smaller, the further we drove.
        I got home and went immediately to my room. I got my pajamas on and munched on some candy. I never really got any sleep that night, maybe 40 minutes total, but I sure did learn some very important lessons.
1.        Never do things you’re not comfortable with
2.        Never Go to Nights of Horror
        But the most important lesson I learned was 4 words and 20 letters long,
3.        Haunted Houses are evil.


The End
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Comments (2)

Kinnare
This is a pretty good book:)
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Hanuel
thx
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on October 22, 2016
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on October 22, 2016