Loe Family Co.

Loe Family Co.

The Loes decide to start a business. Then, it takes a terrible turn when they find another business.

published on April 2514 reads 9 readers 3 not completed


It was a normal day in the Loe company.

Lochelynne opened up her laptop and got onto Qfeast and started browsing while drinking a brew she made with her Smole Soaps. Meanwhile, in the back of Loe headquarters, Yuzu made ads saying “TRY THE NEW AYUMI JIZZY SOAP OR I WILL DIE” and left the building to paste them on every surface she could come across. Kiara was writing a new theme song for the said soap.

The chicks were working as hard as they could. “Man, I wish Lochelynne paid us more. We should find a new business.” One chick said. “Yea, I agree.” The other chick said. They heard footsteps approach so they immediately shut up and got back to working. The footsteps belonged to the FBI who was trying to see if the chicks were doing their job.

Alaric entered the room. “Babe!” He kissed FBI agent number 3. The night Alaric was sent to area 51, The agent shined a light into the smoker hole, and that’s when he looked into the smoker hole, and fell in love with Alaric Mole. “The soaps are safe, So are the chicks” Alaric smiled. The FBI nodded and left the Chick area.

Grandpa Loe was doing graphic designs for the soaps. Soldier Mouse got onto a laptop and made posts advertising the company. He added pictures of Smoker Hole Human, the mascot, onto powerpoints with captions that said “Try Our New Ayumi Jizzy Soap!”

Hujle stuck his fingers into his fat he developed by doing the fatass challenge on reddit, and dropped the sweat particles into the soap, and gave the soap to Ayumi so she could ship it out. Hujle sat down and pulled out a sweaty picture of Monoe from his pocket. “I miss you my love.... I miss calling you slurs all the time... I wish Lochelynne would give us more breaks so I can call you more slurs...” Hujle cried while talking to the Monoe photo. A chick hopped into the room. “Man wtf why are you complaining about Lochelynne giving you no breaks when we work 24/7 in this smoker hole heat and you guys get to get off work. We work more than you and you still get more money.” The chick said. “Man shut up you slur” Hujle said, wiping his sweat from doing absolutely nothing away.

All of a sudden, Everyone heard a scream. Not just any scream- a smoker scream. Everyone ran to the front. Lochelynne was disheveled- her hair was messed up and frizzy, and her mole was red, which meant she was mad. “L-Lochelynne.. What’s wrong?” Grandpa Loe said. Lochelynne pulled up Qfeast and showed an ad.

“...App guy’s IN A MINUTE!! bananas company?” Yuzu said, looking harder at the ad. “wait wha?” Kiara said. There was an address on the ad. “Come on, Into the smoker loe car!” They all went into Smoker Loe car and drove away.

They pulled up to the company. App guy stood in front of the building with Yuno. Everyone angrily stomped out of the car, aside from the chicks, who stepped out with passion. “Maybe, we can just sneak into this business.” One of the chicks said. “Yea let’s go” The chicks all hopped into the business. Nobody noticed because they were so small and Lochelynne was too angry to care for the chicks.

“Welcome to App Guy IN A MINUTE!!! Bananas headquarters, How may I help you?” Yuno smiled. “You are a fake yandere, I’m the real insane toriningen yandere! your company will fail against ours!” Yuzu did her infamous yandere laugh. “Oh really? Why don’t we just fight then?” Yuno pulled out a dagger. “No! The only person who get to kill me is myself!” Yuzu stomped. “Go inside, if you think you’re so much better. We heard your business is catastrophic compared to ours.” Yuno said, stepping out of the way to let them in. They all angrily entered.

They looked around. The building was amazing, almost like a castle of some sort. Very neat and clean. “Hello.. Loe family co...?” Chiba said confused. “Yea, Chiba you think you’re so much cooler than us, making a business better than ours, at least Loe has been a longer name than yours has!” Lochelynne said. “App Guy IN A MINUTE!!! Bananas is longer than Loe Family Co but okay” Damien said. Lochelynne facepalmed. “I meant we have been a company lon-” “K nobody cares anyways, you wanna see how the business works? Just go to the back and see our TWO workers.” Chiba said. “See, we have only 2 workers and we are a more functioning company.” Damien added. Lochelynne stomped to the back.

Lochelynne swung open the door. Rowlf was making theme songs for the new banana flavor called Lochelynne sucks. Seiko was testing out the new bananas. “These people are terrible..! A dog? Making music? Are you kidding?” Yuzu rolled her eyes. “Man, I bet them bananas taste like shit.” Alaric said and kneeled, taking a bite of a sandwich he left in his pocket.

“Yea! And why are those little yellow things hopping around the banana- Wait. Chicks...!? LOE CHICKS!!!” Lochelynne tried to grab the chicks before Seiko grabbed them. “They work for us now..” Rowlf stood up and started making a glass of water. “Seiko get your dirty butthole hands of my god damn chicks!” Grandpa Loe screamed. “Yea! Didn’t Damien make a post saying you said something about buttering up your pooper? You’re getting your asshole butter germs all over my chicks my GRANDPA LOE hatched!!” Lochelynne’s eyes pricked with tears. “Well your smoker hole air was hurting them!” Seiko said.

Everyone started to run up to Seiko to tackle her down and grab the chicks. Rowlf tried to step in front of Seiko to protect her and the chicks, Until he tripped over Hujle because his fatness made Rowlf fall, and his glass dropped. Everything turned slo mo as a SINGLE water droplet fell onto the chicks toenail.

Lochelynne screamed. Yuno and App guy entered the room and picked up Lochelynne and dragged her out. Lochelynne screamed and kicked. “GIVE ME BACK MY CHICKS!!!! THEY WILL DIE!!! THE WATER KILLS THEM!!!! NOOO!” Lochelynne sobbed.

The Loe Company had passed on.
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Comments (3)

TvT no.
Just no.
This story is not part of the loe family name.
Name your freaky business something else, damien. As well as your fictional employees
on April 25
on April 25
on April 25