How I feel right nowI didn't think there could be more tears.
Again I was wrong, like a river they flowed down my cheeks,
The warmth of the glistening droplets was the only warmth I had that night;
No mom would come: to tell me its ok, to hug me, to make me smile.
It felt horrible to be alone;
It felt horrible to feel abandoned: cause if your mom didn't understand you then who was on your side?
A sliver of hope was all I needed but what I had was my false dreams of hope.
The tears perched along my face had a reason to be there,
I wished I could join them, just so that I could be next to something, have a short life and fall to my doom.
Falling was the easiest part, you couldn't stop yourself and you could have some joy before you hit rock bottom.
That was a comforting thought among all the unpleasant ones swarming in my head on this gloomy night.
Right now was all that mattered, I could cry and scream but what would that do.
I comforted myself because that's what I'm good at.
A good attitude and perspective was what I needed,
perhaps someone someday will care enough to be there for me and then it would feel like all my problems were solved;
and that's all there was to it at the moment