simple_sheep - Page 275

Someone: You curse too much
Me: Bitch no I fuc king don't shut the fuc k up you bag of dicks the last fuc king time I cursed was a fuc king long time ago so fuc k you asshole I don't motherfuc king curse bitch....shit

What's with all the Snowballs in My Candy Love

Okay so on Youtube I was looking at the comments and apparently there's this fuc king 6 year old on there that can play the piano, violin, hockey (as quoted "Perfectly, he could be the youngest in the NHL" ), baseball, and when he comments it's in perfect English, the grammar is great, ext
Six? Hahaha more like fuc king sixteen idiota, no one believes that you're fuc king SIX

Movie from Real life, Breakfast edition
Movie breakfast: *ten plates full of bacon, sausage, eggs, waffles, strawberries, other fruit, pancakes, toast, powder sugar, a jug full of orange juice, coffee, tea, flowers in the center of the table, ext*
Real breakfast: *a slice of bread*
Movie mom: *makes that much fuc king food for breakfast*
Real mom: *doesn't make breakfast because what kind of mom makes breakfast like that? If you have a mom like that you're lucky AF*
Movie kid: See More▼ *sees all the food, takes on strawberry and leaves for school*
Real kid: *eats nothing because no one has that much food and goes to school*
Movie dad: *reading the newspaper, eating the breakfast, drinking coffee*
Real dad: *either already at work, or still asleep*

Hiiii

Sleep is for the weak if it's this early!....and I..am very...weak at the moment

YOUR PROFILE PIC

Me: *hasn't had the hiccups in weeks, hell maybe a few months*
Hiccups: Bitch you thought
Me: *had the hiccups 15+ times today and it's nonstop so it's hard to breath*

Hi my child

Me: *had migraine, tired AF, so drained from energy*
Time: 7:30
Me: I CAN'T SLEEP TILL 11 CAUSE IF I SLEEP EARLIER IT WILL SHOW THAT I'M WEAK

Walk up on North's profile like what up I started a fight about cock

Bean wants huggles.

If I ever got bit by a snake:
Paramedic: Can you discribe the snake that bit you!??!
Me: Well...for one thing...IT LOOKED LIKE A FUC KING ANGRY ROPE

"I wanna see you in booty shorts ?"

Undertale: Say pasta, we'll be there
*distant running and screaming*
Homestuck: *flips down newspaper* You fuc ked up *slowly leaves the room*
Undertale:????????
Hetalia: *kiCKS DOWN THE MOTHER FUC KING DOOR* YOU CALLED?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!
Undertale: *scREECHING*

Friend: Why am I so fuc king emo
Me: It's because of your skinny black genes

Person 1: MY secret talent is singing
Person 2: Yeah? Well, MY secret talent is art!
Me: My secret talent is doing nothing and still getting tired