The diary (One direction Fan Fic)

The diary

Liam P.O.V
The funeral was just too painful to go. I didn't want to see her pale, lifeless body lying in a casket. Instead of going, I just wrote a letter and asked Niall to put it in the casket, on her chest. Of course while Niall was gone, I just sat there thinking of the past and how if I had never left her, this would have never happened. Franziska was a beautiful girl with sparkling green eyes. She had beautiful blonde wavy hair that went down to her waist. Her voice was beautiful and calm, like an angel, most people would say. And yet I never had the chance to tell her that, I never had the chance to tell her how much I really love her and ask her to be my girlfriend. Never. This is what caused me great pain. She was breaking and falling apart while I ignored her and lived my own life. She wanted to be part of my life but I never accepted. Yep, I rejected her so many times. Now you're asking yourselves, why I ignored her and why I never told her about my feelings or never helped her when her life was hell. It's because of two things, one my dad abused me a lot, he saw how I loved her so he thought he'd help me out by 'teaching' me a lesson. He bought me to the basement and chained me to a chair where he kept hitting me, punching me and telling me if I ever were to date her, I'd die. I was always asking myself why my dad actually did this when I realized how painful his past was. He used to be abused too but he never gave up and ran away from home. He found a job in a big company and met the woman of his dreams, my mum. He married her but never wanted children. But one day, my mum found out she was pregnant. At first, my dad didn't take this too well but then decided to give it a try and when he did mum left and he got fired so he blamed it all on me and started beating me.
Now last, was because I was popular and she was not. I never wanted to be an outcast. Whenever the guys saw me talk to her, they'd laugh at me and tell me how uncool it was to talk to 'lame' people so I stopped. I know, I'm stupid and I never deserved her love but school was the only place I felt right and where I had friends. I used to get bullied so it felt nice to be popular for once. "Liam?" I snapped out of my thoughts and immediately looked up to find Niall holding a book that was wrapped in plastic. "Niall. How was the funeral?" I asked even though I didn't want to know. "It was fine. I placed it on her chest and her parents started crying. The funeral was quick and I also saw a few of her bullies. They were there, crying buckets. Anyways, how are you feeling?" My eyes were red and puffy from all the crying and I haven't slept in days ever since I've been informed about her death. "I'm fine." I lied. I don't want to lie to Niall but I don't want him to worry about me. We have to much on our hands right now. "Apparently Franziska left you this as a goodbye present." Niall said breaking the awkward silence. He handed me the book. "A diary?" He nodded quickly before coughing. "I better go. If you need anything, call me." This is what I liked about Niall. He'd always be there for you no matter what. He was a good friend. "To Liam Payne, From Franziska." I turned the next page to see an extra one glued. A letter. "Dear Liam, if you're reading this, it probably means I gave up and killed myself. Liam, you were the only one I trusted, the only one I loved. I wrote this diary to show you how much I love you. I have written down all the moments and memories we've had together, thinking it made us closer when it didn't. I hope you keep this forever and never forget me. Never. Thank you for all the wonderful memories that I will always treasure in my heart. Will always love you, Franziska." I dropped the book on the floor, to ashamed to carry on. She loved me and I ignored her, shrugged her off like she was nothing. She didn't deserve this. I should have died. Time passed by as I laid on the ground, hugging the book. Come on Liam, she wrote this for you. The least you could do is read it. I sat up and held the book tightly, still doubting. Liam, read it, do it for her. I opened the book again, feeling the soft pages and finally getting the courage to read this. Here goes.